Birds of a Burgundy Feather
by Seeker of Miracles
Summary: A tribute and apology to a friend of mine and a far superior writer. The content of the story is of a court proceeding and the reflectance on crimes and punishment that goes along with.
1. Birds of a Burgundy Feather

Author's Note: This is a tribute to _**BrokenRepublic**_. A truly great man who I've wronged many times over. We **use** to be **good friends**. But I couldn't commit and carry on **the** **way a good friend should**.

I'd like to think our friendship **stood for something**, even if _I killed it._

This story is written to serve many purposes:

**To stand for a friendship lost**. **And to dissuade others from making the same mistake I did**.

**To show humility and respect to those that read it**.

**To highlight the greatness of this **_**inspirational, revolutionary,**_** and **_**compassionate**_ **young man: **_**BrokenRepublic**_.

**And to serve as an apology to a man I can no longer bring myself to speak to.**

And is displayed in a medium we both love: _Literature_.

_Purgatory is the place a good friend goes if it guarantees the better friend carry on to Heaven. ~ Hashim Niloc_

* * *

Penitenziario di Bonta Lena Amici:

The gaol spiraled in place, suspended in animation. The rooms moved separately from one another, slamming together only when necessary for someone to pass from one to the next.

The child's hands were bound in simple shackles, the chain between them short and sturdy. In his eyes shown a resolute sense of defeat. His face was tarred and smudged, along with his armor and clothes, evidence of many stumbles and falls since the last time he had set out from somewhere. He appeared to be no older than ten or twelve.

The guards escorting him were your rudimentary run-of-mill guardsmen. Chainlink cowls, steel helms and breastplates adorned their person. A long-shafted poleax grasped in their free hands as the others firmly held the child's small arms and kept him in line.

Their expressions were blank… plain.

To someone looking in from the outside, the sight might have seemed unceremoniously cruel. Unjust perhaps. But they'd lack the adequate information to judge the situation properly.

The boy had committed a crime, one befitting the punishment. The punishment was overly considerate in fact. The boy deserved far worse.

And he knew it.

* * *

Three days prior….

…In Aula di Tribunale del Passato.

"You need to cool off!" Snow said. His tone was harsh, but his eyes were forgiving. The words caught in his throat despite his natural mastery of the tongue.

"Oh yeah?!" The same child from before snapped back in youthful defiance. Stubborn insubordination.

Snow grimaced, the backlash leaving him appalled. But most of all, _hurt_.

Snow's attorney placed a gentle hand on his broad shoulder. Shoulders that despite their size seemed to positively diminish with defeat.

"Don't worry." Snow's attorney said.

"I'm worrying."

The judge, Valfodr banged the gavel, "Cease!" Was all he spoke in a booming commanding voice to get everyone's attention.

The child put on a strong face. His purple hair bound by a tribal bandana adorned with burgundy feathers.

"Caius Ballad, you have been summoned here to be tried on the following charges: Conspiracy, First degree murder, second degree murder, accessory to murder, accessory before the fact, accessory after the fact, conspiracy to be an accessory to murder after the fact, conspiracy to be an accessory to murder before the fact, conspiracy to commit misdeeds, negligence towards the wellbeing of others, defiance towards the wellbeing of others, openly putting others in harm's way, and last but not least threatening the wellbeing of the Goddess…. How do you plead?"

The boy looked down at a spot in the centre of the room, "I-…"

"He's done nothing wrong!" Caius's defence attorney protested. "I beg the courts to reconsider."

Valfodr shook his head, "The courts need not remind the defence that even possessing the intent to commit these crimes is grievous enough to warrant a proper hearing and a _proper hearing _will commence today. I need not remind you that there are several other crimes the perpetrator could be made accountable for, but the state, and those representing the state have deemed them to be unnecessary and to try Caius Ballad on these charges as well would be unceremoniously cruel. _How do you plead?_"

Caius looked around the room, looked at the faces that had shown him lifetimes of kindness and compassion. Faces that even now, continued to show him that same kindness and compassion.

And then his head dipped down low. "Guilty, your honor."

Caius' attorney brought her hands up to stifle a gasp, to little success.

"Very well. On the aforementioned charges, the court hereby sees the defendant guilty and sentences the defendant to 932 lifetimes of penal detention in _the_ maximum security penitentiary. Case is dismissed." Valfodr brought the gavel down.

* * *

Penitenziario di Bonta Lena Amici:

The guardsmen escorted Caius across revolving platforms, as the child looked out at the glorious panorama of the universe. Nebula's swirled and shifted as stars supernova'd and galaxies did their thing.

It was a beautiful thing. He immediately turned his gaze away from it.

Somewhere gentle music played and he shook his head at the irony.

"Excuse me, but why the pleasantries?" He asked his escort. "Why am I not buried in a hole somewhere a thousand feet underground?"

"Listen kid, there's a lot you have to learn about the universe, and in this place you're going to have all the time in the world to think about it. It's a punishment alright, don't confuse yourself. But the idea of a punishment is to learn your lesson." One guardsman said. His nametag read [Cid].

"Yeah. Nobody hates you, even if what you did was wrong. The real punishment is the way you're feeling now. You're the real judge, jury and executioner. Think about all the things you threw away."

The other spoke in a jovial, reassuring manner. His nametag read [Zack].

"Nothing I say will ever alleviate my sins… I realize that now… Forever and ever I replay the same things over and over again in my head. Each memory was unique… Each memory meant something to myself."

Zack grimaced, "Yeah, that's not going to get any easier to cope with considering the length of your sentence…. Sorry I mentioned anything."

"It's alright." Caius lied.

"No it's not, you stupid fool! You should DO something about it. Before it's truly too late." Cid snapped, the grass reed in his teeth being clenched to bits.

"But how? I'm here. There's nothing I can do to make amends." Caius looked over at the nearest Nebula. "Even if there was it'd be fruitless, I'd only achieve the same mistakes once again."

"Actually, if ya think about it hard enough, you keep making all new ones." Cid tried to reassure the boy.

"Eh, I don't think that helps, Cid." Zack said with a shake of his head.

"This mastery of time," Caius spoke softly. "Is a double-edged sword. Granting me just time enough to attempt to make amends, but also just enough to ruin those same attempts."

Zack shook his head once again, "You're no master of time. Not here, especially."

"Nope!" Cid chomped on his grass reed, "In this place you're just another person what done did wrong and you have to suffer for it."

"Suffering is fair." Zack said. "It allows us to learn, to cope, and hopefully to teach. Maybe if enough suffering happens, we'll all learn from our mistakes."

"But at what cost?" Caius looked down at his shackled hands. "How many people must be subjected to pain? How many lives must be lost in order for us to truly and adequately learn?"

Cid shook his head, "Now you've darn gone and lost yourself the point! The point isn't loss. There isn't a quota and then suddenly _POW!_ you've rid the world of suffering. No. The point is to learn down here. Within." He said this last measure with a jab towards Caius' heart.

"In the heart of Etro…" Caius spoke slowly as if he finally understood.

"Yes, in the heart of- eh?! No, ya nit! Down here, in YOUR heart!" He jabbed harder, this time actually against Caius' breastplate.

"You've wronged a lot of people." Zack reminded him. "But you're lucky, you've got time and maybe someday they can forgive you."

"Yeah, forgiveness comes from two places. You… and them." Cid reaffirmed Zack's message.

"But time won't wait around for you forever." Zack warned.

"And neither will friends." Cid smiled.

"You two don't fully understand. The grievances on my part cannot be so easily undone. The harm I've inflicted upon others is catastrophic. You fail to realize I am the villain of this particular tale." Caius again looked defeated. "And no measure of rewrites or changes can unfetter that."

"If that's truly how you feel." Zack said. Cid remained quiet.

"My penance... my punishment is mine to bear."

The two guards escorted him to his cell. A lavishly adorned prison cell with one of the most magnificent panoramic views of the universe. Wordlessly they stepped back from the cell as it detached from the main structure of the gaol.

Caius sat down and stared up and around the stars. Some of them appeared to blink and glisten like tiny, wet, peering eyes in the heavens.

"If I was to make up for my crimes, how would I go about such a fallible task?" Caius Ballad mused to himself. "Perhaps I'd start with the infallible truth."

* * *

Author's note: Sorry, BrokenRepublic. I'd like to believe we _were_ great friends. Friends _too great_ perhaps for the situation we were in. If things had been different…. Perhaps our friendship wouldn't have been strained and you wouldn't have suffered so. I take full responsibility for my mistakes.

Though I feel life is too short to hold onto grudges, there are actions that cause pain and that pain is not easily amended. I also feel that distance and _removal_ of the _source of such pain_ is totally and fairly necessary.

But you deserve praise, and I do not mind giving it.

To everyone else who reads this, take away this important message: You only live one life, you only have one friend, you only possess one heart, so do treat those things with _great consideration_.

Secondly, read _**BrokenRepublic's**_ "**Broken Shield**" and "**Final Purification**" both those titles are singlehandedly the best, most tenderly-cared-for stories on this site. And as they stand _right now,_ and _alone,_ make anything and everything I could ever write look like pathetic scrawling in a public restroom.

Seriously, _**Go read them!**_

If by writing this story and handling it this way breaks some kind of rule… so be it. I do not regret writing it.


	2. Flock Together

Author's Note: This is a tribute to_** BrokenRepublic**._

_**Long ago, when I was just a boy**_  
_** So alone then, last of my kind in the world**_  
_** I believed futures could be reborn**_  
_** I would go back in time**_  
_** Change what's to come**_

_** Hunting, searching for futures I've dreamed**_  
_** Ever chasing, believing visions unseen**_  
_** Hearing that hope is futile**_  
_** Only inspires me not to give up**_

_** Valhalla is calling me to the end**_  
_** I can hear now the beating hearts of lost friends**_  
_** Urging me not to forget them**_  
_** As the last hunter**_  
_** I'll find the key**_

_Noel's Theme "The Final Journey"**  
**_

_Composed and arranged by Naoshi Mizuta  
Lyrics by DAGMUSIC LTD  
Vocals by KOKIA_

* * *

The Grey Sandy Beaches of the Void Beyond:

The landscape shuddered and relocated itself at seemingly random intervals and at the slightest disturbance.

At any moment the end looked to be drawing near.

A disgruntled and despairingly lost Noel Kreiss sat on the edge of the grey hopeless beach, the black tar-like water licking at his feet.

His hands drooped in his lap, salty water pelleting the center of his palms.

A slight breeze tussled his hair.

"I'm sorry." He repeated.

"I'm sorry. So truly, deeply sorry." He repeated. _As if the words would make the pain go away_.

"I couldn't protect her."

"It's alright." Snow lied, walking over to the beach.

His sudden appearance made Noel jump. "No. It isn't. I killed her."

"Yeah it is. And _you_ didn't kill anybody." Snow pointed a gloved finger at Noel before wiping the back of his hand on his pant-leg before sitting down on the beach next to him. "Caius did. And he used you. He played everybody. Even my sister."

Snow thrust a thumb at the ruins behind him, and in Lightning's general direction. As if it could realize the gesture, the ruins suddenly shifted, like distortion in a television screen and momentarily depicted the crashed and splintered form of a fallen Cocoon.

Noel didn't stir. His defeat still painted on his face as clear as day.

Snow reflected that in this ever-constant, shifting time. Noel, his posture and position appeared to be about the only thing that wasn't changing.

Even his tear-soaked eyes remained unflinching.

Snow rubbed at the back of his neck. "If it makes you feel any better. I forgive you."

"How can you?" Noel thought to himself. Images of Serah flashed in his mind, over and over. How enthusiastically she talked about Snow. The way she said the word 'fiance.' Like that one single thing was all that mattered. How quickly the stresses and pains of everything else, even Lightning's disappearance didn't seem to matter for that one… single… fleeting moment.

All the time in the world… All the options at hand. And he had to pick that one. He had to bring her along.

"Why didn't I just leave her with Hope and the others?!" Noel nearly screamed inside his own head.

Outside his face remained as frozen in despair as ever.

Snow eyed the younger man. "Where's his confidence at? His moxy? Is this really the same Noel I met at Sunleth Waterscape in 300 AF?" He thought.

"Listen, you can keep beating yourself up…" Snow stated slowly.

Awkward pause as Noel continued to do just that.

"…Or you could do something about it."

"Like what?" Noel said, still staring at the palms of his hands, noting how his tears had made his hands all sticky.

"I don't know. Something."

Noel's eyes narrowed. The intensity of his stare increased.

"Finally." Snow thought, noting the little change in Noel's disposition.

Noel's eyes shifted back and forth slightly. Combing over every word, every memory in his head since this journey began. Everything Caius said or did. Everything Lightning said or did. The phantom Arbiter of Time. Mog. Hope. Alyssa. The Historia Crux breaking down. Serah.

And everything ground to a halt.

The world shifted and shuddered, again as if the scenery was the screen of a television on its last legs.

"You know…" Snow offered, "If you continue to sit there and mope, nothing'll get done. So… come on. Up."

The tall man raised to his feet and gestured upwards with both hands.

For the first time, Noel turned away from his hands and looked in Snow's direction.

For a moment he saw his grinning face before the scenery shifted again….

…And Snow was gone.

* * *

Author's Note: This marks the final chapter of this story. Always look after your friends.


End file.
